


miracle

by icedmango, leillypad



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Idol Industry, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:07:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25827163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icedmango/pseuds/icedmango, https://archiveofourown.org/users/leillypad/pseuds/leillypad
Summary: Kageyama Tobio finds Hinata Shouyou when he needs him most and realizes that the world is a lot brighter than he had thought.(Tobio becomes idol Shouyou’s y/n.)
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 5
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> ✰ The premise of this AU is that while Kageyama continues playing volleyball in high school, Hinata instead becomes an idol.   
>  ✰ This was beta'd by the amazing [akaeijis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/akaeijis).   
>  ✰ Please do keep in mind that while this story is based around the Jpop industry, it contains elements of Kpop idol culture as well. Both authors acknowledge that these two industries and cultures are wildly different and are by no means attempting to lump both into one category.   
>  ✰ Thank you! We hope that you enjoy reading!

Tobio's life was going to shit.

As he walks away from the entrance of Shiratorizawa Academy, he wonders if Kazuyo-san is disappointed in him.

The cold wind nips at his face, his nose and cheeks are stung red, and although Tobio feels filled to the brim with overwhelming sadness and anxiety, he still can't bring himself to cry. He has no reason to cry, he thinks. Almost everything that's happened is his own fault, anyways.

When Tobio arrives home, the house is empty. Out of habit he calls out a soft greeting anyways, takes off his shoes and shuffles into his room. He crawls into his bed, pulls the blankets over his head and closes his eyes to sleep, to escape.

It's a fruitless effort, and his dreams remind him of the team who turned away from him and of the loneliness he feels in a world that no longer has his grandfather in it.

..

It’s a week later when Tobio finds himself having to make a choice: Aoba Johsai or Karasuno.

Most Kitagawa Daiichi alumni are invited to play for Aoba Johsai, and Tobio is no exception. Aoba Johsai is a strong school, and maybe in any other circumstance he wouldn’t be having this crisis and accept the offer with no hesitation. The thing is, Tobio is terrified. Going to Aoba Johsai means facing the same people who resent him for being the tyrannical “King of the Court”. 

Going to Aoba Johsai means having to play on the same team as Oikawa Tooru again.

On the other hand, there’s Karasuno. Tobio is familiar with the school because of the famed Coach Ukai, who had previously led the team to Nationals. Once a powerhouse school, Karasuno’s reputation has been whittled down to the title of “the Flightless Crows”.

Tobio’s initial interest in Karasuno had purely stemmed from the fact that Coach Ukai was rumored to be coming out of retirement. However, those rumors fell flat and instead Coach Ukai’s grandson would be taking over as the team’s coach.

Tobio doesn’t know anything about Ukai’s grandson. All he knows is that going to Karasuno would be walking into a future of uncertainty, and although the idea of a new start with people who are essentially strangers, who’s to say this new team won’t hate him any less than the guys at Seijoh? Maybe he’s cursed and he’ll never have a place no matter where he goes.

Before he sinks further into his own negativity, Tobio hears the front door open and the sound of his older sister calling out a greeting. He didn’t know she was coming home this weekend.

As usual, his parents aren’t home, but he figures she probably wasn’t expecting them to be. Miwa isn’t around as much anymore, especially after she moved and went off to college, but few things ever change around here and their workaholic parents suddenly remembering the existence of their children would never be one of them.

(In the very rare circumstance it _does_ happen, well, Tobio knows to start preparing for the oncoming apocalypse.)

He pushes his current dilemma to the back of his mind and gets up from his lying position on his bed to go greet his sister. 

He finds her in the living room, curled up in the corner of the couch, typing away at her phone. The TV is turned on and is playing some variety show, the volume on low. Miwa doesn’t seem very interested in it.

“Welcome home, nee-san,” Tobio says softly, instinctively bringing his hand up to scratch at the back of his head when Miwa lifts her gaze to look at him. He shouldn’t feel this awkward around her, but Tobio has always been bad at talking to people. Miwa used to be one of the few exceptions until she quit volleyball a few years ago and drifted away from him as she became preoccupied with other aspects of her life while he dedicated most, if not all, of his time to getting better, _stronger._

“Ah, Tobio!” Her eyes light up, delighted to see him, and Tobio instantly feels more comfortable. “I thought you weren't home! Have you been doing okay?” Miwa gestures for him to sit next to her on the couch, and he obliges, shuffling over and plopping himself right in the middle.

“Just fine,” he mumbles out, focusing his gaze on the coffee table in front of him. He really hasn’t been ‘fine’ for a while now, but she doesn’t need to know that.

He wonders if Miwa still kept up with local volleyball news, and if so, did she see the article published about him and his school? He knows she won’t say anything even if she did-

Miwa shifts in her seat so she’s facing him, and she extends a hand out to thread her fingers through his hair. “It’s getting a little long,” she hums, “want me to cut it?”

Tobio doesn’t think he needs a haircut, but he knows his sister is always looking to practice her hairdressing skills. He nods, “yeah, okay.”

“Tomorrow?”

“Sure.”

She ruffles his hair affectionately before pulling away and leaning back into the sofa. It’s at that time when something on the TV catches Miwa’s eye. She sits up straighter. reaches for the remote on the coffee table in front of them and turns up the volume. Tobio doesn’t watch TV often, so he’s not familiar with many programs, and frankly has no idea what’s going on.

It’s a music program, one he’s fairly sure he’s seen before in passing. There’s a live audience, and two hosts are sitting on cushioned bar stools on stage. The hosts, a young man who appears to be in his mid-twenties and a girl with pretty green eyes, are waving at the audience and smiling at the camera, microphones and cards in hand.

_“Welcome to the show everyone, it’s a pleasure to have you join us,”_ the man starts, _“as you all probably already know, I’m Manabu Naoi.”_

The girl next to him speaks next, _“And I’m Haiba Alisa! We’re all in for a special treat today, aren’t we, Manabu-san?”_

Manabu Naoi grins. _“We sure are! Today’s guest has made quite a jump into the music scene.”_ The audience becomes livelier, clapping and cheering. _“Are you all ready to meet him?”_

He’s met with a loud, unanimous _“Yes!”_

Tobio glances at his sister, “Nee-san, I didn’t know you were into this idol stuff now.”

“I’m not,” she replies, “well, not really, but I’m curious. Everyone’s been talking about him!” She gestures towards the TV screen, where there’s now a series of PV clips playing featuring a short boy with bright ginger hair and a blinding smile.

It’s an introduction video. Tobio is hardly paying attention to what’s being said, but he picks up a few phrases here and there. Hinata Shouyou, fifteen years old, JUMP Ent.’s newest solo artist has finally come out with his shining debut.

When Hinata Shouyou is brought on set, he’s welcomed with cheerful clapping and warm greetings. The young idol appears to be bashful- he’s waving both of his hands and bowing slightly to the two hosts. His cheeks are flushed a light pink that clashes horribly with the color of his hair and his eyes, a sweet honey brown, are filled with sparkles.

The boy walks across the stage to take his seat on the open chair next to the two hosts. He appears to struggle a bit- the stool is a bit high, and he puts his hands on the cushion as leverage for him to hop on. He shifts in his seat, trying to get comfortable, and he’s visibly flustered.

Everyone else in the room seems to find it endearing. Haiba Alisa practically has hearts in her eyes, and Tobio figures the same could be said for the rest of the audience, judging by the low _aw~_ ’s and small shouts of “ _Shou-chan~!”_ that he can hear.

Hinata Shouyou grabs the mic Manabu hands him, and swivels his chair so he’s facing the audience. The camera zooms in on his face, and with this closeup, Tobio has to admit that he’s pretty damn cute. 

The boy gives the camera his largest grin possible, his eyes becoming half crescents, and he says, _“Hello, I’m Hinata Shouyou! It’s nice to meet you!”_

His voice is both nothing and exactly what Tobio expected. It’s vibrant and lively and every word is highlighted with color. It’s the kind of voice that draws people in- the kind that demands attention and makes you want to listen. Tobio wonders if his voice is naturally like that, or something he’s practiced- a voice he trained that’s exclusively for the public to fit his idol persona.

_“Hinata-kun, it’s so nice to have you on the show!”_ Alisa begins to gush, her hands on her knees as she leans forward slightly in her seat, her entire body displaying genuine joy.

Shouyou swivels back to face the hosts, his feet are swinging and he bows his head once more. _“Thank you, Haiba-san! You too, Naoi-san! It’s an honor to be here for my first TV broadcast!”_

The interview starts rolling.

Alisa quickly glances at the card in her hand as she speaks, _“Hinata-kun, you’re the second solo artist to debut under your label, JUMP Entertainment, after Sugawara Koushi-san three years ago. You’re also both from Miyagi! Are you a fan of him yourself?”_

_“Ah, Suga-san!”_ Shouyou’s eyes light up and he nods eagerly, _“Yes, of course! He’s super cool, and I really admire him!”_

_“Would you say he inspired you to become an idol?”_

_“Hm… not exactly. Suga-san definitely was part of the reason I decided to train and debut under JUMP, but my decision to become an idol was pretty impulsive, now that I think about it,”_ he brings his free hand up to scratch at the back of his head and laughs shyly at himself. He quickly realizes he’s messing up his carefully styled hair, and quickly puts his arms down and clasps both his hands tightly around the mic, eyes wide as he straightens up his posture.

Tobio realizes then that Hinata Shouyou is actually really nervous, no matter what impression his otherwise loud demeanor says otherwise.

The audience is laughing at him though. They think it’s cute, or something like that, but Tobio feels that maybe their reactions aren't helping the boy on stage feel any better.

This team, Manabu speaks, moving along the conversation. _“Impulsive? What do you mean by impulsive?”_

Tobio watches as the idol unconsciously twiddles with his fingers. _“Eh, well… is it okay if I say this? Honestly, until three years ago, I never considered becoming an idol. I was given this opportunity by chance, and I figured, why not?”_

Manabu nods in understanding, _“If I remember correctly, rumor has it you were scouted off the street by a JUMP Entertainment manager. Is that true?”_

_“Yeah! That manager was Suga-san’s manager, actually! I was walking home from school after club activities with my friends, and we were just goofing around, being loud. Singing. I guess we sounded pretty good, because Suga-san’s manager stopped us and asked if we would consider auditioning for the company. We would’ve thought it was a scam, but then Suga-san walked up behind him and greeted us!”_

The reveal elicits a gasp from both Alisa and the audience. Alisa goes on to ask, _“The first time you met Sugawara Koushi was in the streets?!”_

Shouyou nods enthusiastically. _“Yeah! He was in disguise though, with a black cap on and sunglasses. Pretty obvious, if you ask me,”_ he laughs. _“I was shocked, though! At the time, Suga-san had recently debuted, and because he was already a known actor, everyone was talking about him. The same guy I had seen on TV, the guy whose song my friends and I were just singing, was suddenly right in front of me!”_

Sugawara Koushi is a name Tobio is definitely familiar with. Child actor turned idol- it was big news. Tobio has heard his music playing in the club room and in the hallways at school. Sugawara Koushi is extremely talented, and he had captivated the entirety of Japan’s youth with his charming smile, sweet demeanor and a _really good_ debut single.

_“So, you auditioned for JUMP. after meeting Sugawara-san?”_

_“Yep! Well, my friends and I did, and we all made it. Erm, well, we were originally supposed to debut together. I was supposed to debut in a group, not by myself...”_ Shouyou trails off at the end, and although his tone doesn’t necessarily change, it’s still light and conversational, Tobio can tell by the drooping in his shoulders and the way his eyes are casted down at the ground that they’re beginning to touch on a topic that makes him sad, if not, uncomfortable.

Alisa seems to pick up on it, because she changes the direction of the conversation. _“Hinata-kun, you’ve yet to tell us why you decided to become an idol!”_

Shouyou turns to look at the audience, and the camera is once again focused on his face. His expression is soft, and there’s a warmth and depthness to his eyes that wasn’t there before. He seems to have made eye contact with someone in the audience, because he smiles softly, and it’s sweet and genuine and so _different_ from the ones he’s been showing throughout the show. Tobio doesn’t know what to make of it.

He won’t admit it, but his heart skips a beat or two. 

Shouyou takes a deep breath and looks into the camera. _“Well, there was a time where I felt like having dreams were pointless- that my dreams didn’t matter. Don’t give me that look, everyone! I know, I know, that sounds rather gloomy and totally unlike me, huh?”_

He smiles sheepishly, clearly apologetic for shifting the conversation in a more serious direction. _“So, um, yeah! It felt like no matter what, there was always something blocking me, like a big wall or something, you know? But then I managed to get this opportunity!”_

Tobio knows what he’s talking about- has become much too acquainted with being abandoned and ostracized. He knows what he means by being blocked. He’s so used to being surrounded by walls, used to being caged in, and it hurts him to realize that he doesn’t even remember whether he was cornered or if he built up those walls himself.

(Maybe it was both. A battle within himself became a war with everyone.)

_“I really hated those feelings, though. I don’t ever want anyone to feel what I did. So, I decided to try and bring happiness to anyone who listens to my songs. I want to be a light to people who are still struggling to overcome that wall. I want to... I want to make people feel invincible! That’s why I decided to become an idol.”_

His whole life, Tobio had only ever cared about volleyball. Every waking moment his mind is on the gym, the ball, when he’d get to play next, how can he get better, what can he do to stay on the court longer. His unwavering passion for the sport has been instilled in him since the day he was born and it’ll continue to drive him until the day he dies.

What was happiness if not the familiar smell of salonpas, the sound of sneakers squeaking, the feeling of a sweaty jersey clinging to your body and the pure thrill of competing and the insatiable hunger of winning?

Tobio finds his doubts and worries once again clouding his mind. Reminders of his mistakes, his failures, his losses, it’s all so painful and his chest _hurts_. He glances at his sister, who is completely focused on the idol on TV. He thinks about how much he misses having her around, how he wishes she still lived at home so he wasn’t alone all the time.

He thinks about how he really, _really_ misses his grandfather.

The interview portion wraps up, and then it’s time for Hinata Shouyou to perform.

From Tobio’s understanding, not everyone is meant to be an idol. He knows he certainly isn’t. Idols have to be able to sing and dance and sing _while_ dancing. Idols have to be able to look good in front of a camera, know what pose or expression to give, know what words to say to interviewers, to fans.

Most importantly, idols have to know how to capture hearts and soothe souls. Idols are inspiration- they’re beacons of hope.

Hinata Shouyou sings of wishing on more than just shooting stars and of reaching, _jumping_ for all of the gems in the sky. His movements are, for the lack of a better word, _bouncy_ , and there’s so much joy and warmth in each step and in every wink and grin to the camera, and Tobio is in awe.

_The stars shine brighter the darker the night / Be a little selfish / Wish and wish and wish some more / It’ll be okay, the stars are meant to be held by you, anyways._

Tobio wonders if happiness can really be found in a beautiful boy, a boy he doesn’t and will never know, who carries the sun in his soul and in his gleaming promises and wishes?

Tobio doesn’t really get it, doesn’t know much about the intricacies of idols and their appeal but he thinks none of that matters when he finds himself lost in the melody of Shouyou’s voice and storing every note he sings and every word he says in his heart. He _knows_ Hinata Shouyou is definitely one of those people meant for the stage, one of those people who were born to shine, born to inspire, born to be an _idol_.

Like a moth to a flame, Hinata Shouyou is a light Tobio wants to follow, and he thinks that maybe, just maybe, he can grasp light within his own hands.

From that point on, Tobio’s life began to be colored in gold.

..

Tobio ends up enrolling at Karasuno.

Later on and further along the road, Tobio would begin to describe his life as being split into two distinct eras: Before Shouyou (B.S.) and After Shouyou (A.S.). His discovery of Hinata Shouyou was a turning point, a shift, the moving of gears in the machine that was his life.

Kageyama Tobio loves volleyball. He lives and breathes the sport, and there’s nothing else he’d rather be doing than playing volleyball.

Except, _maybe_ , listening to Hinata Shouyou’s music, watching his music show performances and variety appearances.

After that first initial interview appearance, Tobio had gone on to search and download Shouyou’s debut album- _Miracle_ , with a lead single of the same name and five other tracks.

Tobio listens to _Miracle_ religiously, the album on constant repeat. He discovers that he likes listening to it best when he’s on his jogs, the silence that once accompanied him was replaced by energetic upbeats and a honey voice now pushing his legs to run a little bit faster, a little bit further.

Tobio loves it, loves the happy and energetic upbeats or the soothing piano melodies, loves how he can get lost in the music and in Shouyou’s voice, loves how every song has some message of hope, of comfort, of _you’re doing alright, you’ll be okay,_ and _after all, I’ll always be here._

It was only a matter of time before he went down the rabbit hole that was radio broadcasts and music shows and special appearances on TV shows and interviews, and eventually started listening to Shouyou’s past radio show appearances to fall asleep.

_What would you like to say to people who may be feeling lost right now?_

_Hm… I would tell them that it’s okay to be lost, and to wander a little bit! It might be scary, but if you just keep going, you’ll definitely be found._

Apparently, he was quite obvious with his newfound admiration for the idol. Tobio was really embarrassed when Miwa had one day bought him a magazine that featured Shouyou on the cover.

The thing is, Hinata Shouyou is a breath of fresh air and clear skies, and even if he can’t outrun all the doubts, frustrations and insecurities that plague his mind, he can at least hide away from them, if only for a short while.

Kageyama Tobio loves volleyball.

But sometimes, volleyball isn’t what he needs. Volleyball isn’t a cure-all, at least not the way it used to be.

What he needs is a fresh start. So when the first semester of his first year in high school comes around and he begins playing for Karasuno’s volleyball club, he makes a conscious effort to get along with the team. He doesn’t want to be the King of the Court anymore, doesn’t want to be all the things his ex-teammates said he was.

_Believe in yourself! Make your own miracle happen!_

His upperclassmen are nice.

Daichi is a perfect fit for the role of captain- he keeps the team united and together. He has clear goals- _Karasuno back at Nationals_ \- and he’s serious and passionate about it.

Asahi, despite his intimidating appearance, is soft and timid. He has anxiety and a lack of confidence, but Tobio can tell he’s a true ace at his core. He just needs to be reminded of what the view from the air looks like. 

He thinks Daichi and Asahi are strong and reliable, and most of all, patient. Tobio has always needed that- kindness and patience.

The second years are a wild bunch. Tanaka and Nishinoya are loud and obnoxious but they’re _fun_ in a way that Tobio finds refreshing. The energy around those two alone is different from what he was used to at Kitagawa Daiichi. Even if he doesn’t understand their jokes or behavior or why they freak out everytime Kiyoko breathes in their direction, he really enjoys having them as teammates.

Out of all five second years, Tobio gets along with Ennoshita the most. He thinks it’s because Ennoshita is the most approachable of all his upperclassmen without being overwhelming. There’s no pressure and he’s comfortable around Ennoshita, who doesn’t seem to hold any special expectations of him like the others do.

He likes his upperclassmen and he even likes Coach Ukai and Takeda-sensei, too. He respects them and they’re strong in their own right. He likes Karasuno, likes that he gets to be a starting player and he likes that although he’s still struggling to understand what it means to be a good setter, everyone is working _with_ him and not _against_ him. They tell him when he’s wrong and aren’t intimidated by the “genius” status imposed on him and they don’t give in to those moments when he begins to dictate, don’t let him revert back to his tyranny.

Then there’s the two other first years who joined the club.

He tries to be nice and refuses to snap easily, but sometimes, he can’t help it. Tobio thinks Tsukishima Kei may be one of the most irritating people he’s ever met, and that’s saying something, considering the fact that he knows Oikawa Tooru.

It’s not his fault, though! Tobio doesn’t go looking for fights, it’s exhausting and drains him emotionally and he always ends up feeling shitty. But Tsukishima had made it his goal to get on his nerves whenever possible.

Tsukishima constantly challenges him and is always looking for a way to poke fun at him. He keeps Tobio on his toes, makes his school life a little more interesting. He wants to win at everything, including whatever… _this thing_ is that he and the four-eyed middle blocker have going on.

But even if he has to deal with someone as annoying as Tsukishima, he’s felt more at home at Karasuno in his first month of being on the team than he ever did in his three years at Kitagawa Daiichi.

At some point throughout the year, in between practicing and meals and studying together, Tobio actually befriends his fellow first years. Whether it was just out of familiarity or not, Tobio doesn’t know, but all he’s sure of is that he’s really and genuinely _happy_.

One day, Yamaguchi urges him to join the realm of social media so that he “isn’t left behind” and “I want to send you memes”. Tobio figures there was no harm in it, and it seemed convenient for keeping up with news on Hinata Shouyou.

So he makes a Twitter account.

**tobio** @kgym09

hi

**↳ tadashi** @yama_tds

@kgym09 omg you really made an account

**↳ kei** @tsukik

@kgym09 deactivate immediately

**↳ ↳ tobio** @kgym09

@tsukik @kgym09 i’m blocking you

Tobio follows his teammates, some kids he knows from his year, the players from Nekoma and Fukurodani, the official accounts of pro volleyball players and teams from the VLeague. He then follows @HinataShouyou and @suga and other related accounts.

He doesn’t think much of it, but apparently, his excessive use of the like and retweet function on all of Hinata Shouyou’s tweets was _weird_ and totally unexpected of him. He receives questioning texts and direct messages.

**_beanstalks_ **

**Yamaguchi Tadashi**

kageyama what's up with the spam

**Kageyama Tobio**

?? huh

**Yamaguchi Tadashi**

you rted like … all of shouyou-kun’s tweets …..

**Kageyama Tobio**

what about it ?

**Yamaguchi Tadashi**

nothing i just didn’t know you were a fan of his !

**Tsukishima Kei**

you should see his lock screen lmao

**Kageyama Tobio**

shut up

**Yamaguchi Tadashi**

omg you’re a FAN fan

He didn’t see what the big deal was. Contrary to popular belief, he _does_ enjoy things outside of volleyball.

**@oikawa followed @kgym09**

**@owoikawa sent @kgym09 a Direct Message**

**tooru**

tobio-chan

i see

that u like shou-chan

👀

**tobio**

hi oikawa-san

yeah i do

and?

**tooru**

just so u know

suga-chan outsold

_You can no longer send Direct Messages to this person._ **Learn more.**

**tooru** @owoikawa

tobio blocked me 😭

**↳ hajime** @IwaiH

@owoikawa deserve

Tobio decides he doesn’t like everyone scrutinizing his online activity, and ends up making another Twitter account exclusively to tweet about his favorite idol. A “fan account”, if you will.

That’s when Tobio discovers the beauty that is Twitter and the capability of spilling your unfiltered and most redundant thoughts, of being able to say pointless things just for the sake of saying them.

**kags** @shouyousbf

hi ??

**kags** @shouyousbf

if you also like hinata shouyou follow me

**kags** @shouyousbf

i just think shouyou is very talented and very cute

**kags** @shouyousbf

@HinataShouyou hi

**kags** @shouyousbf

@HinataShouyou follow me back please

**kags** @shouyousbf

hinata shouyou ruined my life

**@shoustars followed @shouyousbf**

**@shouyousbf followed @shoustars**

☆ **Shouyou ☆** @HinataShouyou

Hiya everyone! I hope you all have an awesome day !! ☆☆☆

**↳ kags** @shouyousbf

@HinataShouyou thank u for my life

**Suga** @suga

@HinataShouyou see you in the studio later!

**↳ kags** @shouyousbf

@suga @HinataShouyou collab ?

☆ **Shouyou** ☆ @HinataShouyou

Q&A time !! let’s talk ! ☆^-^☆ #AskShou

**↳ kags** @shouyousbf

@HinataShouyou do you like boys #AskShou

**↳ waka** @shoustars

@HinataShouyou what would you be doing if you weren’t an idol? #AskShou

**↳ ↳** ☆ **Shouyou** ☆ @HinataShouyou

@shoustars @HinataShouyou playing volleyball !! my first dream was to be a pro player and to make it to the world stage !! #AskShou

**↳ ↳ ↳ kags** @shouyousbf

@HinataShouyou @shoustars omg

**kags** @shouyousbf

shouyou is literally the boy of my dreams ....

**kags** @shouyousbf

@HinataShouyou i’m a volleyball player let’s get married #AskShou

**↳ waka** @shoustars

@shouyousbf @HinataShouyou i play volleyball as well

**↳ ↳ kags** @shouyousbf

@shoustars @HinataShouyou really ?!

**↳ ↳ kags** @shouyousbf

@shoustars @HinataShouyou wait no leave im trying to talk to shouyou

**@shoustars sent @shouyousbf a Direct Message**

If you told Kageyama Tobio (B.S.) he’d actually have a sizable social circle and a good amount of friends, that’d he’d actually bond with his team and start using social media and invest time and energy into things other than volleyball, he’d look at you as if you grew one or two extra heads and quite honestly feel utterly offended. Volleyball is _life._

To Kageyama Tobio (A.S.), volleyball is still life of course, but he’s learned to enjoy the world around him a little bit more. His first year comes and goes in a flash, with Karasuno having successfully won a ticket to the Spring Interhigh. They finally battle it out with Nekoma in their first official match together and win. Karasuno loses after that.

Their beloved third year upperclassmen graduate, Ennoshita-san becomes captain and new first years join.

He becomes fairly close with Twitter user @shoustars. In the middle of Tobio’s second year, they disclose more personal information about the other. He’s shocked to find out he’s been talking to Shiratorizawa’s former ace and current wing spiker for the Schweiden Adlers Ushijima Wakatoshi.

Maybe the reveal would’ve made their friendship more awkward, considering the fact Karasuno’s win over Shiratorizawa had broken their undefeated streak **,** but Wakatoshi-san had become one of Tobio’s closest friends.

There would be two grand surprises in Tobio’s life from that point.

The first was catching feelings for none other than Tsukishima Kei.

He didn’t realize it himself- it was pointed out to him by Yamaguchi. The events that would soon follow were a disaster, with Yamaguchi playing wingman and Tsukishima still referring to him as _King_ and Tobio ready to combust because he didn’t understand these feelings at all.

Why would he like somebody like Tsukishima Kei? Tsukishima is an _asshole_ , he’s annoying and rude and gets on his nerves _all the time_.

And whilst Tobio was thinking of all the reasons he shouldn’t be excited to see Tsukishima, of why it’s not giddiness but frustration and wariness because he needs to be ready to snap back at whatever snarky comment gets thrown at him, his mind also supplies him of everything he likes about him.

_He helps you study._

_He’s a really good blocker. He’s gotten so much better since the start of first year._

_He looks for you during lunchtime._

_He pays attention to you._

_It’s fun being around him._

_You two don’t even really argue anymore._

_It’s flirting._

Somehow, by some miracle or maybe Cupid’s arrow itself, Tsukishima likes him back. The confession was anticlimactic and happens in the club room a few days before the team heads to Tokyo for their summer camp. Yamaguchi was sick that day, had stayed home and thus Tsukishima walked to school by himself, and he and Tobio were the first ones to arrive at the club room. Maybe it was all the pent up tension and pining and the not so subtle flirting that had pushed them to the breaking point, but Tsukishima tells him to shut up before Tobio even says anything and Tobio ends up kissing him. It was his first kiss.

**kags** @shouyousbf

i guess i have a boyfriend now...

**↳ waka** @shoustars

@shouyousbf your name is no longer relevant... change it immediately.

**↳ ↳ kags** @shouyousbf

@shoustars @shouyousbf i have two hands. ...

**tadashi** @yama_tds

dating jpop stans is so crazy … like you really just have to be at peace with the fact that you’re a placeholder until they meet shouyou

**↳ kei** @tsukik

@yama_tds yamaguchi shut up

Their relationship lasts well past Nationals and into the beginning of their third year, and as first loves tend to go, the flame that was once burning so brightly dies out. The break up is mutual, they agree to remain amicable, but Tobio still hurts.

He wouldn’t have minded if they stuck together just a little longer.

Tobio doesn’t linger on it much. He’s vice captain of Karasuno now, wears the number 2 on the back of his jersey, and he’s looking at getting right into the VLeague after graduation. His path is clear and he knows who he is now and where he’s going, who he wants to be.

Hinata Shouyou has grown exponentially popular since debut, and he continues to be a reminder of all the good things Tobio wants for himself and what he’s capable of being. The idol is months away from releasing his highly anticipated 2nd full album.

He pretends he doesn’t notice the atmosphere shifting between his ex and Yamaguchi. It’s ironic, he thinks, how Yamaguchi used to joke about third wheeling them and now the tables have turned.

The second grand surprise happens during Interhigh Qualifiers.

They’re playing against Dateko. Yamaguchi is up to serve, Tsukishima is standing next to him in the rotation. It’s the beginning of the third and last set. They win this and they’ll have to compete against Aoba Johsai for a ticket to the Spring Interhigh.

Yamaguchi does his jump floater. Service ace. The crowd cheers. He serves again.

His serve is received, everyone on the court starts moving, the ball is flying.

Tobio doesn’t usually look towards the stands. Nobody has ever shown up to his games for him, nobody besides Miwa, who has gone to see him on one or two occasions but has been too busy since. He knows there’s nothing for him up there.

He thinks he’s imagining it at first. He blinks his eyes rapidly, rubs at them, but there’s no mistaking the sparkly wide brown eyes looking into his deep blue, or the iconic tufts of ginger sticking out from underneath his cap.

Even with the mask, it’s undeniable. It’s him.

Hinata Shouyou is sitting in the front row of the stands closest to the court, hands clutching the rails, staring right at him.

_This can’t be real._

He feels dizzy, he hears Tsukishima yelling at him (“Tobio, what the fuck, watch out!”) and then there’s a ball hitting the side of his head and he’s on the floor.

The whistle blows, his vision is blurry, his teammates gather around him and the last thing he sees is Hinata Shouyou’s horrified expression when he pulls his mask down before he slips into darkness.

And that’s how Kageyama Tobio ends up in the infirmary after probably the most embarrassing moment of his life.


	2. Chapter 2

And like that, Shouyou’s day goes from amazing to _shit_.

When Karasuno’s #2 falls, the gymnasium does not fall silent — if anything, the din only gets louder, and Shouyou, feeling more than a little ill and off-balance, clutches the balcony railing hard as people shove their way to the front and gawk.

The other Karasuno members have all flocked around their #2, huddling over him like a frantic, sweaty, protective orange dome. Shouyou leans forward, squinting, tries to make out #2 between the elbows and knees. He can’t.

“Did he _die_ ,” some kid yells out next to Shouyou, half-awe and half-confusion. “Mom! Mom!”

“No, dear, he just fell,” his mother says, gentle and with enough certainty that Shouyou slumps with relief. “The ball just hit him very hard.”

Shouyou exhales, leans back a little so he’s less in danger of falling out. The mom nearby is right: #2 just got hit and fell.

It doesn’t get rid of the image of #2’s wide, shocked eyes locking with Shouyou’s before the ball hit him, though.

A horn blares, and Karasuno’s members disperse, leaving #2’s limp body on full display. His face is shiny with sweat and there’s a red-purple bruise angrily blooming on his forehead. His mouth is slightly open, and his eyes are closed. Shouyou’s stomach lurches. Medics rush over, carrying a stretcher. Shouyou blinks, and #2 is swiftly carried away.

Shouyou isn’t really thinking. The stretcher leaves through the swinging gymnasium doors with Karasuno’s coach and manager, the game is slowly called back into session, and Shouyou turns around and runs, mumbling excuses as he delicately shoves his way through the crowd, head ducked down and burning.

..

It’s surprisingly hard to find the nurse’s office. Shouyou runs into multiple dead ends and moldy water fountains before some kind student points him to the right direction.

Shouyou rounds the bend leading to the nurse’s hallway with a squeak, and runs right into #2.

“Oh,” Shouyou says, somehow still standing. #2 is sitting on the floor looking extremely confused, a bandage on his forehead and a navy-blue ice pack clutched in his hand. “I’m – I’m so sorry, I’m so –” Shouyou holds out his hand, and #2 stares at it, confusion slowly shifting into an emotion Shouyou can’t recognize. “I’m so sorry, I wasn’t looking, I’m so sorry. Are you okay? Here, take my hand, I’m sorry –”

#2 weakly takes Shouyou’s hand, grip hesitant. His hands are cold and clammy with sweat, but so are Shouyou’s. Shouyou pulls him up, still rambling apologies, and #2 looms over Shouyou, wobbly and unsteady, so Shouyou only holds his hand tighter.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, are you hurt?”

“I’m okay,” #2 says, finally, voice very faint. His face is no longer as sweaty as it had looked when he had been pulled away in a stretcher, but a very delicate shade of pink. “I – I’m okay, it’s fine. Thank you for,” he stares down at their hands. “Help – helping me.”

“It’s the least I could do,” Shouyou mumbles. “I – I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” #2 says, a little stronger, still staring at their hands, and Shouyou finally takes the cue to drop #2’s hand. “I – I’m Kageyama. Kageyama Tobio.”

“Ah. Kageyama-san, I’m sorry for running into you.”

“It’s fine –”

“And,” Shouyou continues, hands twitching at his sides. “You looked at me before you – fell. I distracted you, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s fine.” Kageyama’s face is turning red. He won’t meet Shouyou’s eyes, just stares at the spot above Shouyou’s shoulder. “It’s – it’s fine.” An awkward pause, then Kageyama asks, in a rush. “Are you – are you Hinata Shouyou?”

Shouyou hesitates for maybe half a second, then pulls down his mask to flash Kageyama a grin that’s a little frayed at the edges, but steady enough. Kageyama stares, then looks away, lips twitching. “Yes. Yes, that’s me, the one and only Shouyou. Did you recognize me, then?”

“... Yes.”

“I’m sorry the sight of me distracted you, Kageyama-san.”

“It wasn’t you, Hinata-san,” Kageyama says, quickly, face flushed a blotchy tomato-red. “I was – I was dehydrated and just tired, when the ball hit me, so I fell. Nothing to do with you.”

“Ah, really,” Shouyou says. He glances at Kageyama’s forehead, at the bright white bandaid taped over his right eye, and looks away. “I’m sorry, all the same. You were playing well.”

“Oh. Oh, um, thank you, Hinata-san.” Kageyama clears his throat. “I… didn’t realize you were interested in volleyball.”

“Oh?” Shouyou tilts his head. “Hm, I’m sure I’ve mentioned it –”

“Of course, of course,” Kageyama cuts in, hurriedly, and Shouyou bites back a wider grin. “I knew you were interested and that your favorite team was, um –”

“Could I buy you some juice, Kageyama? As an apology, or as a gift, whichever one.” Shouyou shrugs, watches Kageyama’s face go through a range of emotions. It’s fascinating. “Unless, of course, you need to get back in the game –”

“Oh, the nurse won’t let me back in, so –”

“Oh, that makes sense. Come on, then! We can share drinks together!”

By the time they reach the vending machine in the next hallway over (for this, thankfully, the school had placed arrows and a helpful guide everywhere), Kageyama’s face has cooled down to pink, and he only stutters a few protests when Shouyou gets him a bottle of orange juice.

“You’re too kind,” Kageyama says weakly, unscrewing the bottle slowly. “Thank you, Hinata-san.”

“Hydration is important, Kageyama-san,” Shouyou says, buying a water bottle for himself. “Please take care of yourself, I want to see you play your next match, too.”

“Oh. Oh, will you –”

“I hope I’ll still be free for your next match,” Shouyou clarifies, flashing him another grin. Kageyama’s lips twitch and Shouyou realizes now that he’s trying to smile back. “You play well.”

“Oh. Thank you, Hinata-san.”

They drink together, Shouyou leaning against the vending machine and Kageyama leaning against the wall across from him. Shouyou pretends not to notice Kageyama glancing at him between sips.

“Does your head hurt, Kageyama-san?”

“Hm? Oh, no, I’m fine now, Hinata-san. It – it doesn’t hurt very much.”

“That’s good! I hope you heal soon enough.”

“Thank you. I will – I will do my best, Hinata-san.”

It’s nice: like this, Shouyou almost feels like he could be any other student at the school, taking advantage of the chance to meet and talk to the volleyball team’s star player, with nothing standing between them. Shouyou wearing a neon green hoodie Kenma had given him as a birthday gift two years ago and one of Natsu’s yellow denim baseball caps, Kageyama wearing his orange-black jersey. No manager there to break them up, no contract dictating the level of contact they’re allowed to have. Just the two of them, talking and watching each other.

It would be nice.

“Can I,” Kageyama starts, suddenly, and stops. His face turns red, again. Shouyou takes a sip of his water and waits, curious. “Could I get your autograph, Hinata-san? Um. If it’s okay, of course –”

“Of course you can,” Shouyou beams at him. He has a Sharpie in his pocket. “Are you a fan, Kageyama-san?”

Kageyama looks like a tomato. “Yes. I am. I’m a fan of you, Hinata-san. I — I loved your new mini album. It was very… warm.”

“Warm, huh.” Shouyou smiles. “That’s good to know, Kageyama-san, I’m glad.”

Kageyama is staring down at his now-empty bottle of orange juice. “It was warm,” he repeats, then continues a little more steadily, “It wasn’t too different from your usual concept, but it was a little… softer. I think that you did well.”

Shouyou’s latest mini album had had a summer night theme, with the music video consisting of him trying to catch fireflies while singing about future opportunities and love against a jazzy instrumental. It wasn’t a dramatic departure from his traditional summery concepts and cheesy lyrics on upbeat melodies (JUMP Ent. liked to slot Shouyou’s releases for spring and summer, while Suga got the fall and winter), but Kageyama wasn’t wrong – the company had wanted something a little more _mature_ , just testing the waters to see how the fanbase would react, and they’d finally let Shouyou share his thoughts to the creative director, so.

“Oh.” Shouyou can tell his face is pink. “I’m… glad that you enjoyed it, Kageyama-san. It was different, yes,” he continues, trying to control his grin from being too wide. Kageyama’s comments aren’t too different from the professional music critics and the youtubers Kenma links him to, but the giddy rush of being acknowledged and praised for it is always the same. “But I had fun with it! I’m glad that you liked it, thanks!”

“Yeah,” Kageyama says, screwing and unscrewing the bottle cap, still not looking at Shouyou. “Do you… do you enjoy it?”

“Hm?”

“Being an idol,” Kageyama clarifies, and it’s only years of practice that keep Shouyou’s smile from slipping. “It must be nice, and you’ve said –”

The question, really: unremarkable. Shouyou gets it, the curiosity and awe of _wow, you’re an idol, why’d you do it_ , and the half-earnest, half-scripted answer is on the tip of his tongue, _Music is a powerful force that can heal people and help them connect and after spending my life feeling I didn’t really belong and that my dreams didn’t matter I wanted to use my career as an idol to help people feel invincible!_ and Kageyama’s not that remarkable of a fan, either, but.

But, it’s the thing: Kageyama, playing volleyball and soaring through the court with such elegance and grace, totally free and unencumbered, getting to touch the ball and toss it high and his teammates getting to jump up high like particularly large birds and spike it to victory, not worried about breaking any rules to talk to Shouyou, not worried about getting yelled at for getting injured, and still – and _still_ – asking with so much intensity _do you enjoy it, being an idol, it must_ –

“Of course it’s nice, Kageyama-san,” Shouyou hears himself say. Kageyama screws his bottle shut and Shouyou gives him an easy grin that he _knows_ dazzles, and Kageyama’s face is very, very red. “Music –”

Shouyou’s phone rings and they both jump.

“I’m sorry,” Shouyou mumbles, and checks his phone even though he knows that the chorus of screaming chickens means that it’s his manager. He takes a deep breath, entertains the notion of rejecting the call, but that would be rude, and, well, maybe Kageyama’s already heard this spiel about music in one of Shouyou’s older interviews. “I need to take this, Kageyama-san, I’m sorry –”

“It’s completely fine,” Kageyama cuts in, and maybe he looks disappointed, but Shouyou can’t tell for sure. “Please don’t worry, I know that you’re busy –”

“Wait, please give me a minute,” Shouyou says. He tosses his empty water bottle in the trash can next to the vending machine and pulls out the Sharpie from his pocket. “Is it okay if I sign the bottle? I don’t have paper with me, sorry.”

Shouyou’s a professional, at the end of the day.

“Oh, um,” Kageyama says. Shouyou walks closer, uncapping the pen with his teeth, and Kageyama looks a cross between confused and just dazed, but his hands are steady as he holds out the bottle, nails neatly trimmed. “Thank you, Hinata-san, it really wasn't that important.”

“Don’t be silly,” Shouyou mumbles around the pen cap, not sure if Kageyama can hear him over Shouyou’s still-ringing phone. He spins the bottle around, finds a white patch on the label, and scrawls out _to Kageyama Tobio, thank you for your support!! rest well and take care of your head, Hinata Shouyou ♡♡♡_ in tiny, scrunched up letters, but it looks legible enough. He hands back the bottle and caps his pen, and smiles at Kageyama’s red face as he speed-walks away, finger hovering over the accept call button. “It was great meeting you, Kageyama-san!” he calls out over his shoulder, waving. Kageyama silently waves back in a jerky movement. “I’ll find you again, later! We’ll talk more then! Get well soon!”

He breaks out into a run after, and doesn’t hear what Kageyama says in response to that, if he says anything at all.

..

Like the vending machines, the school’s exit is much easier to find than the nurse’s office.

“Sorry, Yachi-san,” he says as soon as he accepts the call, voice muffled because he’s trying to yank up his face mask and talk at the same time (as the tabloids have noted: Suga has mastered this movement with grace; Shouyou has not). “I was a little busy, but I’m here now!”

“It’s alright, Hinata-kun,” his manager says, voice tinny and warm and far away. Shouyou can picture her sitting at her desk, drinking coffee and tapping the list of items she needs to talk to him about. “How’s your vacation going? Are you well?”

“I’m doing well and enjoying my time off, thank you,” Shouyou says, then hesitates. “I wasn’t expecting you to call me so soon, though.”

He tries to keep his voice level, and mostly succeeds. It’s really not his manager’s fault – she had been there with him, negotiating with JUMP Ent. directors and board members to get him a one month vacation instead of _zero_ days off before his second album release.

And yet, she’d also been the one to tell him, when he asked for the vacation in the first place, that it would have been a little more considerate to his fanbase and the company to just not ask for one at all. _You’re an idol, Hinata-kun_ , she’d said, not unkindly, as she slid him a pack of tissues in lieu of commenting on him crying. _This is the idol life you signed up for. You agreed to give up a normal life for this, didn’t you?_

Shouyou hadn’t answered her then. He didn’t know how then, and doesn’t know how to now, either.

There’s Kageyama’s voice, in his head, _I loved your new mini album. I think that you did well_ , while nursing an awful bruise on his forehead that Shouyou’s responsible for. _Do you enjoy it, being an idol? It must be nice_.

It must be, huh, Kageyama-san.

“I didn’t mean to disturb you,” his manager says, voice soft like she knows how it stings. “Really, Hinata-kun, I wanted you to rest. JUMP, however,” she continues, and Shouyou can hear the crinkle of paper being flipped through. “Has updated your contract – nothing substantial has changed,” she adds before he can ask. “The wording of a few sections has simply been updated to reflect the company’s growth.”

“Oh. Okay.” Shouyou nods, even though she can’t see him. “So I need to visit Tokyo…?” _I’m on vacation_ , he does not say, but his manager knows and understands him all the same.

“That’s the good news. I can email it to you and you can send it back with your digital signature.”

“Oh. Thank you, Yachi-san.”

“It’s no problem at all. Could you get the updated contract back to me by tomorrow, ten in the morning?”

“I can look it over tonight.”

“Thank you, Hinata-kun. Enjoy your vacation, okay? Rest well.”

“Thanks, Yachi-san,” Shouyou says, and his manager clicks her tongue as _you’re welcome_ before hanging up.

Shouyou exhales, head spinning a little bit, pockets his phone and glances around: he’d just been walking aimlessly when the call started, trusting his feet to crunch through the piles of red-gold-orange maple leaves take him home, and now he’s standing next to a TV store. It’s the same store Shouyou had biked past years ago, when his parents hadn’t divorced yet and he was still on the Miyagi juniors’ soccer team, and a volleyball game had been playing on one of the TVs, loud and bright enough that Shouyou got thoroughly sucked into it after a glance.

_Look, this player is interesting_ , the announcer had been saying, _Keep an eye on him, Karasuno’s #10, their Little Giant!_ And then a player wearing a black jersey had stepped out and jumped, high enough that it looked like he was flying.

Right now, in the present, the same TV is broadcasting a commercial – it’s a commercial for toothpaste that Shouyou stars in, and Shouyou stops walking to watch himself grin and sparkle on TV, holding up the aqua-green tube of toothpaste and promising watchers clean, germ free teeth after three uses.

Shouyou pulls out his phone and calls. “Hey, Hitoka-chan,” he says as soon as the call connects. “How are you, how’s Tokyo? Do you remember the toothpaste commercial I did years ago?”

“Hi, Shouyou-kun,” Hitoka’s voice is tinny, patient and faintly amused. In just a few syllables, Shouyou’s back in his Nerima apartment, glumly chugging some canned green tea with a wince as Yachi read off his schedule for the day, sipping her own with grace. “I’m good, Tokyo’s fine, how are you? How’s Miyagi?”

“I’m good, Miyagi’s fine,” Shouyou parrots back, cheerful, and Hitoka laughs. “The commercial, Hitoka-chan, remember?”

“The one with Lion? Didn’t the toothpaste taste weird?” She hums, contemplative. “It was peppermint flavor, but spicy.”

“Yeah, that one! I just saw it playing on a TV here.”

“Really?”

“Really!”

“Miyagi’s pride and joy, huh,” Hitoka teases, and Shouyou snorts as he starts walking again.

“That’s Suga-san, not me,” Shouyou says. “How are you, really?”

“I’m okay. I’m trying to bake a cake for my friend’s birthday – you’ve never met her,” she adds, before Shouyou can ask. “It’s a strawberry shortcake, and it’s going well!”

“That’s great! Send me a picture later?”

“Of course,” Hitoka says, and there’s the clamor of spoons tapping plastic in the background. “What about you? How’s your vacation going, Shouyou-kun? How’s your mom, and Natsu-chan?”

“My mom’s doing well! She’s busy, but she was happy to have me back. And Natsu’s taller than _me_ now, it’s really unfair!” Shouyou sighs dramatically, while Hitoka laughs in the background, and – Shouyou does miss it, being in Tokyo and joking around in the recording booth with Hitoka, brainstorming lyrics and doodling in Hitoka’s expensive dot-grid journals with her equally expensive gen pens. Yachi-san – who had been Shouyou’s manager since his debut, Hitoka’s mom since her birth – would tell them off but treat them to pizza later on.

A group of small children run past Shouyou, all of them screaming with laughter and one of them clutching a volleyball. It reminds him of the volleyball game from earlier, that he never saw the end to because of Kageyama and his manager, in succession. It reminds him of biking home all those years ago, ready to ask his parents if he could trade in his soccer ball for a volleyball only to be told by his father, very gently, _Your mother and I are getting a divorce_ , and _You’re going to move with me to Tokyo, okay? Natsu will stay here and you’ll still be able to see her_ , and _No, Shouyou, you can’t play volleyball, I’m sorry_.

“Shouyou-kun?” Hitoka says.

“Sorry, I zoned out,” Shouyou says, voice stable, and Hitoka inhales, like she’s about to press that statement, but Shouyou continues talking before she can start. “I saw a volleyball game today. Hitoka-chan, it was so _cool_ , the players were so fast, there was this setter on one of the teams who knew how to set the balls _perfectly_ , and the spikes were so cool! The ball kept going _bam_! It was so much fun, and one of the players recognized me –”

“He recognized you?” Hitoka asks, alarmed. “That’s –”

“I wore a disguise and everything,” Shouyou says, quickly. “The player who recognized me – it was the setter, the really cool one I mentioned – was a fan of me, so I guess he saw through it. He was nice. The setter. I gave him an autograph and said I’d try to see his next game. It was…” _It was like I had a normal life for once_ , he nearly says, but doesn’t.

Hitoka’s known him long enough to fill the gap herself, though.

“That sounds like fun,” she says, and he waits. “Shouyou-kun, you need to –”

“Be careful,” he says. Something _dings!_ on Hitoka’s end, and she mumbles something about the cake being done cooling. “I know, Hitoka-chan. It was just… nice, to talk to him. Yeah, he was a _fan_ , I know, but he was really cool. You should have seen him and his team play, they were so good!”

“He’s a fan,” Hitoka emphasizes for him, gentle, above the sound of clinking dishes. “It really does sound fun, Shouyou-kun.”

“It was!” Shouyou hums, to cover up the pause, and tells her anyway. “He asked me if it was nice.”

“About what?”

“Being an idol,” he says, carefully, and Hitoka exhales on the other end of the line, either out of frustration over her cake or because she knows how this goes. “It was a normal question. A lot of fans ask me that.”

“They do, Shouyou-kun.”

“But it was… odd. I don’t know. Just, hearing it from him, when he gets to play volleyball and do everything ever?” Shouyou sighs, stares up at the spindly trees above him and squints at the harsh sunlight peeking through the leaves. “It was... I don’t know,” but Hitoka does know.

“Shouyou-kun,” she starts, and there’s another _ding!_ in the background. Shouyou readies himself to hear her list off all the things he loves about being an idol, every testimonial from every fan who’s said Shouyou’s music and career changed their lives for the better, even saved it, but what Hitoka says is, “You chose this life,” in a soft voice, knowing full well she’s echoing his manager. “Right, Shouyou-kun?” Shouyou grips his phone tighter to stop himself from ending the call. “That’s why it’s so important to not be reckless. I don’t… I know _you_ don’t want to lose anything.”

Shouyou wants to say _but it’s not fair_ , and _I just want to be normal for a minute_ , and _I chose this life but I wanted to choose volleyball first_ , and _I’m happy and I love it but I just want more_ , and _You didn’t see them play, Hitoka-chan, they looked so cool and I was so jealous, of all of them and especially the setter, he looked so good on court and so free and then he had the gall to tell me that it must be nice, being an idol_ –

The thing is: Hitoka’s been with him since the beginning, since he was a trainee with Koji and Yukitaka running around JUMP Ent.’s neon orange basement while screaming the lyrics of a Hikaru Utada song, since he debuted alone with a chart-topping single that won him the chance to do a Lion toothpaste commercial, since he recorded his first album and cried when the producer told him his vocal abilities were mediocre at best, since he had his first fan meeting and a toddler had screamed _Shou-chan, Shou-chan, please sign my forehead!_ , since his last concert before his vacation when he performed with a raging 38.8 degree fever and got a sprained ankle in thanks.

Hitoka’s been with him. She’s been the one to press ice packs onto him, to laugh with him about his sometimes bizarre fan encounters and to cry over the sweeter encounters, to remind him that voice was growing and powerful and healing in its own way, and to talk to him when he was well and truly alone those first few months in Tokyo.

Hitoka knows him. She knows how hard he’s worked to get to where he is and how much he loves it. Unlike his manager, there’s no malice or strategy behind her words: she just doesn’t want him to lose it all and regret it.

“Yeah,” Shouyou says, and he can see his house, just a little further away. “I chose this. I’ll be careful.” He hesitates. “Thanks, Hitoka-chan.”

“Of course, Shouyou-kun,” Hitoka says, soft. Then, with a little more panic, “Wait, I think I overmixed the frosting, _ugh_ ,” and Shouyou laughs as she desperately tries to fix things.

In his head, he thinks about Karasuno, and the grace and hunger with which Karasuno had been playing until their setter got hit.

..

**Kuroo Tetsurou**

hi hinata-kun

**Hinata Shouyou**

kuroo-san! hello :D

how are you ??

**Kuroo Tetsurou**

i’m good :)

kenma and i played volleyball

1v1, and i won :)

what about you?

**Hinata Shouyou**

wow!! cool that sounds fun :DDD

i’m okay!!!! i’m picking up my little sister from school!

i saw a volleyball game today too! :DDDDDDD

karasuno vs dateko

**Kuroo Tetsurou**

how was it

**Hinata Shouyou**

the game was soooooooo much fun !!!!!!!!

i haven’t seen a real match in ages…

it was so cool!!

the ball moved so fast??

like

i’d look!! and the ball would be with the setter

and then i’d blink!! and the ace would be spiking the ball over the net :0

it was all so fast!! so cool!! the ball kept going, whoooooosh, bam! whap!, scoooooore

so much fun :D

karasuno played well!! :DDDD

**Kuroo Tetsurou**

did they? good :)

i taught them you know :)

**Hinata Shouyou**

:0

dateko was really good too!!!!!!!!!!

their iron wall….it looked scary from above!

but karasuno! they weren’t scared a bit

they got past the wall and made so many points..

and karasuno’s setter!!!!!!! he was so cool !!!!!!!

**Kuroo Tetsurou**

oh, kageyama-kun?

**Hinata Shouyou**

yes, him!!

his tosses looked amazing… :0

wish i could hit one of his tosses

but i probably won’t haha :P

still!!!!!!!! he played well and it was sooooo cool

**Kuroo Tetsurou**

i see…

**Hinata Shouyou**

is he your friend, kuroo-san?

i don’t remember you mentioning him before

**Kuroo Tetsurou**

no, i just know of him

played against him, but haven’t talked to him much

nekoma’s won against karasuno way more times than lost btw :)

he’s a good setter!

**Hinata Shouyou**

yes!! he really isssssss

he’s so cool

he’s a fan of me too!!! :DDD

**Kuroo Tetsurou**

really?

**Hinata Shouyou**

yeah!! i gave him my autograph!!! :D

i’ll find him again later to talk!! :DD

he was nice to talk to!!!!!!!

i want to ask him about volleyball some more :DDD

**Kuroo Tetsurou**

oh… i see :)

good luck finding him

i have connections if you need them

**Hinata Shouyou**

so ominous…

but okay!! thanks kuroo-san

**Kuroo Tetsurou**

no problem! :)

..

**☆ Shouyou ☆** @HinataShouyou

Hey everyone!! Hope everyone is having a good day today (*⌒▽⌒*)θ～♪

**☆ Shouyou ☆** @HinataShouyou

If you are not having a good day… I hope it gets better!!

**☆ Shouyou ☆** @HinataShouyou

[IMG_0234]

Just a few more months, and we can see each other again!! Please be patient, Stay tuned ☆⌒(≧▽° )

**☆ Shouyou ☆** @HinataShouyou

Thank you for all of your love and support so far (♡°▽°♡) I’ll work hard! Thank you!

**☆ Shouyou ☆** @HinataShouyou

[IMG_0235]

Until then, here’s an old picture of me and Suga-san! We used to get ice cream together! Take care everyone!! Stay happy, stay healthy!!!

**↳ Suga** @suga

@HinataShouyou you can’t just drop baby pictures and leave

**↳ Suga** @suga

[IMG_0168]

@HinataShouyou and why do you say it like that!! we still get ice cream together all the time!! look!! just 3 weeks ago!!!

**Suga** @suga

ah he really logged out huh… lol…

**↳ tooru** @owoikawa

@suga I love you I miss you Did you eat well today Thank you for doing a live today You looked so good I think blue hair looks immaculate on you I love you I would die on a battlefield for you

**↳ ↳ hajime** @IwaiH

@owoikawa @suga do you ever shut up

..

Somewhere in between picking up Natsu and walking back home with her, his mom calls.

“I’m going to be late at work,” she says into the phone, grim and rueful. “Shouyou, can you feed yourself and Natsu tonight?”

“Sure,” Shouyou says, neatly arranging his and Natsu’s shoes in the foyer. Natsu had gotten home, kicked off her shoes, and immediately disappeared into her room before Shouyou could yell at her for not putting her shoes away properly. “Can we get takeout?”

“Hm. Can’t you cook, Shouyou? I do recall an interview where you said you knew how to make an amazing curry. I’m sure Natsu would love to try it.”

“ _Mom_ ,” Shouyou complains, and his mom laughs.

“You can get takeout. But think about it, okay?”

And now Shouyou is here: in his room, laptop pulled open to a Google search of _easy curry recipes_ when his phone beeps with a new email.

He glances, then grabs it when he sees that it’s from his manager. _Contract Update_ , it reads, and Shouyou unlocks his phone, opens the email, clicks on the PDF, and skims through it.

His manager wasn’t lying, to his (untrained) eyes, nothing’s changed. There are no new sections and the legal jargon seems like the same legal jargon he signed off on before. Shouyou scrolls through it, finger hovering over the section on expected idol behavior: _employees shall not drink, smoke, be found in possession or use of drugs, or engage in other inappropriate activity; employees shall not willfully seek out and engage in romantic or sexual relationships of any kind whatsoever; employees shall not violate prescribed diets and will maintain a weight that falls strictly within company guidelines; employees shall not –_

He thinks about Kageyama: his pink face and cold hands and trimmed nails and the way his throws were so delicate and the way he played so freely and the bandage on his head, _do you enjoy it, being an idol? It must be nice_.

Shouyou clicks his phone closed and stares at the blank screen, and thinks.

For the absolute lack of support Shouyou’s parents had given him when he came home yelling about volleyball, they’d been practically oozing with support when he got scouted. _What a good opportunity_ , his dad had said when Shouyou came home clutching a JUMP Ent. recruiter card (autographed by Suga, too) in his hand. _Oh, you look so handsome, Shouyou_ , his mom had said when his very first teasers had dropped.

And Shouyou had loved it. He loves it, loves being an idol and singing and connecting with fans.

But.

He’d asked Suga, once, while they were both running together on a treadmill in JUMP Ent.’s newly painted grape-purple basement, _do you regret it, Suga-san, not getting a normal life?_ because Shouyou had jumped into the idol career at the tender age of fifteen but Suga had been in the business for far longer, as a child actor of several different soap operas that every mother in Miyagi would point to and coo over and take pride over. _Do you ever want a little more?_

Suga had grinned at him, flashing a dazzling array of perfectly straight white teeth, and had said, coyly, _I’m content, Shouyou-kun, I have everything I could ever want, don’t I? Don’t you?_

And on one hand: yeah. Shouyou’s happy and greedy for more success as an idol, eager to surpass Suga on the charts and take on the world.

And then on the other hand: wouldn’t it be nice, to just spike Kageyama’s tosses and play volleyball like he did and be a normal teenager, for once, just for a minute.

Something bangs his door, and Shouyou jumps, drops his phone. “ _What_ ,” he yells out.

“Shouyou,” Natsu yells back, punctuating each word with a bang against the door. “I’m! Hungry! And! Mom! Said! You! Would! Cook! For! Me!”

“She did not!”

“She did too!”

“Did not!”

“Did too! Didtoodidtoodidtoodidtoo –”

..

“Shouyou, I don’t think this is edible.”

Shouyou had abandoned his Google search, gone into the kitchen, and had transformed a slim variety of instant meals, vegetables inching the expiry date, and assorted spice packets into a full meal while Natsu had watched, fascinated. The end result had looked good enough that Shouyou had snapped a picture to text to Hitoka later.

Now that they’re eating, though.

“You added too much oil,” Natsu continues, glumly poking the potatoes in her curry. “It tastes so greasy!”

Shouyou bites into a piece of beef and concludes that he might have had too much confidence.

“The rice is still good,” he says, weakly. Natsu glares at him. “C’mon, I tried!”

“I just wanted ramen,” Natsu says, thoroughly gloomy, taking another delicate bite. “Why didn’t you just make ramen?”

“It’s not _that_ bad.”

“I feel kinda sick.”

“ _Natsu_.”

“I’m eating,” Natsu says, making a show of taking another bite. “Did you add sweet potatoes?”

Shouyou takes another bite and chews slowly, like maybe the taste will improve in his mouth with time. “No? The recipe said to use the other ones. The yellow ones? Russets.”

“They taste sweet, though,” Natsu says, popping a potato in her mouth. She chews slowly, too, and it’s just them, chewing together while staring off into the distance.

Shouyou eventually gives up and swallows. “I’m sorry for not making ramen.”

Natsu swallows her bite, too. “Thank you for cooking.”

“We can make ramen next time, maybe? Or mom will be here then.”

Natsu snorts. “Mom’s late a lot this time of the year,” she says, taking a bite that’s almost entirely rice. “I usually eat ramen for dinner.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah. What’s it like at dad’s?”

Shouyou shrugs, takes a bite that’s mostly curry in hopes Natsu will follow his example. She does not. “It’s okay, I guess? I usually have a diet to follow, and dad’s doctor gave him a diet, too, so.” He shrugs again. “It’s just me, eating boiled chicken breasts while he eats some weird kind of salad.”

“That sounds gross,” Natsu says, but she looks a little brighter, maybe at the revelation that between the two of them, Shouyou got the shorter end of the stick with family dinners. “When mom _is_ home, she always makes something yummy. Like udon!”

“That’s an upgrade from ramen!”

“It is!” Natsu hums, thoughtful. “Hey, doesn’t this go against your diet?”

“What, this?”

“Yeah,” Natsu nods, pointing at his plate with clicking chopsticks. “It’s not boiled chicken!”

“I’m on vacation,” Shouyou says, with enthusiasm, and Natsu _ooohs_. “So no diet!”

“Really? They let you do that?”

“Well. As long as I’m at the weight I was before vacation, they won’t know,” Shouyou amends, and Natsu nods, expression completely serious.

“Hey, Shouyou,” Natsu starts, then trails off. Shouyou waits, makes a show of eating more curry.

“Yeah?” He asks, finally. “Eat your curry, too, Natsu, not just the rice.”

“I’m _slow_ ,” she grumbles, but takes a bite of it. Shouyou beams at her. “Is the idol life worth it?”

“... Worth what?”

“The diet. Boiled chicken sounds gross.”

Kageyama, in his head, _It must be nice_ , and Hitoka right after, _You chose this_.

“Yeah,” Shouyou says, voice steady. “Boiled chicken is worth being an idol, Natsu.”

Natsu giggles, and Shouyou’s smiles relaxes into something more natural. “I couldn’t do it. It’s too boring.”

“It’s not _that_ bad. I get to add seasoning sometimes.”

“Sometimes?”

“Sometimes,” Shouyou confirms, and Natsu giggles again. “Anyway, Natsu, how was your day?”

Natsu blows on her bite of curry before eating it, even though it’s not even that hot anymore. “It was good! School was fun, and I did well on my math quiz!”

“Nice!” Shouyou holds up his hand for a high five and she meets it.

“Can I make ramen later, to celebrate?”

Their mom won’t be thrilled, but, well. “Yeah, of course!”

Natsu grins at him, and it shocks Shouyou for a second, how close it is to his own grin, the one that sells peppermint toothpaste. “What about you, Shouyou? What did you do today?”

“I saw a volleyball game!”

“Really? What was it like?”

“It was _so_ cool, Natsu,” Shouyou gushes, and Natsu looks appropriately awed and curious. “Both teams played really well! The ball moved really, really fast.”

“Isn’t that how it’s supposed to be?”

“Yeah, but it was so cool! Like bam, whoosh, whap!”

“Wow!” Natsu says, excited, and Shouyou grins. “Can I go with you, next time?”

“Yeah, we’ll see!” Shouyou takes another bite of his curry and hums. “One of the teams, Karasuno, their setter was really cool.”

“Setter?”

“He throws the ball to players so they can spike it, I’ll show you later! He was really good and a really cool player, Natsu,” Shouyou says, shoveling another bite of curry in his mouth, the plate nearly empty. “It made me miss volleyball.”

“He’s that cool? But you’ve never played volleyball. On a team, or anything.”

“Yeah,” Shouyou says, around a mouthful. He tries to picture it: playing alongside Kageyama while his mom, dad, and Natsu all cheer him on from the sidelines like they do whenever they attend his concerts. He swallows. “Yeah, I guess.”

..

**Hinata Shouyou**

kenma, are you awake

**Kozume Kenma**

no

**Hinata Shouyou**

:(

**Kozume Kenma**

give me 5 minutes

**Hinata Shouyou**

ok :)

**Kozume Kenma**

ok

shouyou what do you want

**Hinata Shouyou**

what game were you playing

**Kozume Kenma**

monster strike

**Hinata Shouyou**

can i play it

**Kozume Kenma**

no

it’s too scary for you

**Hinata Shouyou**

hey >:(

ok i checked you’re right

**Kozume Kenma**

yeah i know

**Hinata Shouyou**

-__-

**Kozume Kenma**

whyd you text

whats on your mind shouyou

**Hinata Shouyou**

i dont know

do you remember when we first met

**Kozume Kenma**

yeah

**Hinata Shouyou**

id been in tokyo for like

6 months?

and then i ran into you

at the school gym

you were playing volleyball

with kuroo-san

and you said you hated it

**Kozume Kenma**

yeah

**Hinata Shouyou**

you were. the first friend i made in tokyo

i think

yeah

you were

**Kozume Kenma**

you were my 2nd

**Hinata Shouyou**

aw really :(

**Kozume Kenma**

yes

**Hinata Shouyou**

after kuroo-san right

**Kozume Kenma**

yeah

**Hinata Shouyou**

i remember when you two got together

wow

remember when you used to text me about him

about how he loved volleyball so much it was kinda gross

but you liked him for that

**Kozume Kenma**

yeah

shouyou are you going somewhere with this

**Hinata Shouyou**

kinda

i dont know

i keep thinking about like

volleyball

and how everyone here my age has like their normal life and stuff

meanwhile im just

here

i cant even talk to ppl w/o risking the company yelling at me

like i love my life yeah but i just

want more

i guess

yknow

**Kozume Kenma**

no i dont know

**Hinata Shouyou**

thanks kenma

i just want to go back to tokyo and stop thinking about this

but like… i fought so hard to just get this 1 month off

and like

i really do want a break

**Kozume Kenma**

you do

you did a whole show with a fever

**Hinata Shouyou**

yeah well

what else was i supposed to do

**Kozume Kenma**

……… not perform………

**Hinata Shouyou**

i didn’t want to cancel :(

**Kozume Kenma**

it’s unhealthy to not put yourself first shouyou

do you get that

shouyou

**Hinata Shouyou**

yeah

ok

**Kozume Kenma**

good

shouyou

focus on what you love doing

but take care of yourself first

**Hinata Shouyou**

i dont get what you mean

**Kozume Kenma**

its 3am

**Hinata Shouyou**

its 12am kenma

does life make more sense in uni

**Kozume Kenma**

idk not really

ok dont

i dont get the idol life but

dont let jump ent run your whole life

youre on vacation

take advantage of that

wear disguises and make friends

have fun and rest well ok

ok?

**Hinata Shouyou**

i dont know

its

how do i make friends wearing a mask all the time

**Kozume Kenma**

i don’t know

you can keep going to the volleyball games

**Hinata Shouyou**

yeah i want to do that!

i met a fan today too!!!!!!

he was karasuno’s setter

he got hit with a volleyball

but !!!!!! he was so cool!!!!!!!!

like his tosses were just so perfect

it made me miss volleyball :(

i wish i could play volleyball with him

i want to spike his tosses

**Kozume Kenma**

huh

you could

**Hinata Shouyou**

what

**Kozume Kenma**

find him again and play volleyball...

**Hinata Shouyou**

i don’t know if i can

**Kozume Kenma**

there arent any rules saying you can’t make friends

or play volleyball on vacation

are there

shouyou

?

**Hinata Shouyou**

i dont know :(

**Kozume Kenma**

well

**Hinata Shouyou**

i dont want to break rules and lose my career

**Kozume Kenma**

i wasnt going to say that

**Hinata Shouyou**

yes you were

**Kozume Kenma**

ok maybe but

what jump doesnt know

??? get it

**Hinata Shouyou**

i don’t know :(

ughhhhh

**Kozume Kenma**

:(

**Hinata Shouyou**

it’s more like

i’m scared

i’ll love it too much

playing volleyball

and being normal

and this entire vacation

that by the end of it

i won’t want to go back

to being an idol and

i’m scared of that

i’m happy

this is what i want in life and i;m

really really happy!!!! i love it

but i don’t want to test that

i don’t want to fall in love with volleyball

and then risk losing my career

i dont

i don’t want to have regrets

i don’t know?

**Kozume Kenma**

shouyou

it’s okay

to want other things

it’s okay to try something else

**Hinata Shouyou**

but it’s

risky

i don’t know

thanks kenma…

i’m going to

i’m going to buy some snacks

**Kozume Kenma**

midnight snack run

**Hinata Shouyou**

midnight snack run!

it’s self care

**Kozume Kenma**

good

**Hinata Shouyou**

yeah

going to go

later kenma

sleep soon

don’t stay up

**Kozume Kenma**

yeah sure

take care shouyou

..

Shouyou’s hesitating between two brands of strawberry juice, blanking on which brand his manager said had less calories, when someone clears their throat behind him. “Hinata-san?”

Shouyou whirls around, Kagome carrot juice in hand. It’s #2 from Karasuno, again, wearing a baby blue jumper and clutching a Meiji milk carton in two hands with the same awed delicacy he had set the volleyballs with during the game – Kageyama, Shouyou thinks, and grins.

“Kageyama-san,” Shouyou says, reaching behind him to grab the strawberry juice at random. “Are you doing well? Is your head alright?”

Kageyama’s fingers hover over his white bandage, and Shouyou almost misses the faint wince. “I’m alright,” he says, awkward and embarrassed, and Shouyou bites his tongue to not laugh. “Thank you. For asking.”

“It’s my fault you fell, Kageyama-san,” Shouyou says with a shrug. “The least I can do is ask.”

“It’s not your fault, Hinata-san,” Kageyama says, hurriedly, face flushed. “The ball hit me and I fell. It – it happens to the best of athletes.”

Shouyou doesn’t remember ever seeing a professional volleyball player fall like that, but he nods along because _what does Shouyou know_. “What brings you here?”

“Here?”

“This convenience store, at –” Shouyou glances at his watch. “– nearly one in the morning, wow.”

“I was hungry,” Kageyama says, lamely, holding up his milk. “Thirsty. I mean. What are _you_ doing here?”

“I’m hungry, too,” Shouyou says, holding up his strawberry juice. The label says it has 100 calories, which, _okay_. “Or thirsty. I guess.”

“Oh,” Kageyama says, with a nod, eyes wide. “I didn’t know that you liked that brand.”

“Oh. Have I mentioned liking other brands?”

Kageyama’s face is pink. “Um. No, I just misremembered one of your interviews.”

“Ah, I see. Want to eat snacks with me, Kageyama-san?”

“Right now?”

“Why not?”

Shouyou picks out snacks he has extremely hazy memories of eating years ago as a child, Kageyama pays (“You paid for my juice last time – please?”), and they both sit across from each other at the picnic bench outside the store, just out of the cashier’s line of sight (not that that really mattered, given how frantically the cashier had been flicking through a thick textbook, barely looking at them as he rang them up).

Shouyou tears open a bag of shrimp chips and angles it so Kageyama can grab from it, too. “Do you enjoy volleyball, Kageyama-san?” Shouyou asks, munching on one chip as Kageyama cautiously reaches over to get one, too. “You seemed to enjoy playing, earlier.”

“Hm? Oh. Yes, I love volleyball.”

“Do you hope to play professionally?”

“Yes. Yes, I hope that I can, Hinata-san.”

“You can call me Hinata-kun, Kageyama-san, no need to be so formal. We’re friends now, aren’t we?”

“Ah.” Kageyama’s nose is a bright, bright red. “Okay. Hinata-kun. You can. You can call me Kageyama-kun, too.”

“So, Kageyama-kun,” Shouyou says, brushing Kageyama’s hand as he grabs another shrimp chip. “How did the game end?”

“Hm?”

“Who won? I never got to see the end, unfortunately.”

“We won,” Kageyama says, and he’s smiling faintly, proud and relieved all at once. “Two to one, and the last set was thirty two to thirty.”

“A deuce? That’s rough, but congrats, Kageyama-kun! Karasuno played well.”

“Thank you, Hinata-kun. I’m – I’m glad that you think so. We worked hard.”

“What comes after this?”

“Oh. There’s still another round of qualification matches tomorrow – whoever wins that gets to go to nationals.”

“Tomorrow? I’ll try to come and watch, then.”

“Will you?”

“Of course,” Shouyou says, smiling, and Kageyama manages to meet his eyes this time. “I said I would. I hope Karasuno wins!”

“Me, too.”

“Will you be playing tomorrow, though, with your injury?”

“I should be fine,” Kageyama says, determined, and Shouyou nods, humming in understanding. “The nurse said I would be healed and okay to play tomorrow.”

“That’s good,” he tells Kageyama, who smiles.

They’re quiet for a few minutes, eating shrimp chips, Shouyou alternating between sips of his carrot juice and strawberry juice while Kageyama drinks his milk diligently.

“You said you listened to my new album, right?” Shouyou asks, eventually, picking at the stickers on his bottle of carrot juice.

He’s tempted to just not ask. _It must be nice_.

But Shouyou is, always, a professional.

“Oh. Yes, I did, Hinata-kun, it was — amazing.”

“Amazing? Warm and amazing, thank you, Kageyama-kun.”

Kageyama’s face is a soft shade of red. Shouyou’s fascinated. “Thank you for working hard,” he says, quietly, not meeting Shouyou’s eyes.

“What was your favorite song?”

“The second track,” Kageyama says, easily, face brightening as he tears open a bag of Purunto grape jelly. “Lucky. The lyrics were nice. Did you write them yourself?”

“Shouldn’t a fan know the answer already, Kageyama-kun?” Shouyou asks, laughing as Kageyama’s face reddens. “It’s okay. I wrote them. It was fun.”

“It sounded fun. The song.”

“I’m glad.”

Kageyama looks nice, in the yellow light from the store behind them and the silvery light from the moon above them. Their hands brush when they both reach for a piece of jelly.

“Hinata-kun,” Kageyama starts, then stops. Shouyou munches on a chip and waits. “Why are you here? I mean,” he continues, hurriedly, before Shouyou can open his mouth. “I – I know Miyagi is where your family lives, but you have an album out soon and nothing said that you were – visiting, or anything –”

“I’m just taking a small break, Kageyama-kun,” Shouyou hears himself say. He bites a chip with too much force.

“Oh. I’m glad that you’re resting, Hinata-kun.”

Shouyou hums, watches Kageyama nibble on grape jelly, and _wants_ – to go back to Tokyo and finish up his album, to go back in time and ask to play volleyball with a little more persistence, to walk around Miyagi and not worry about being recognised and gossiped over, to work a little less, to work a little more, to have a regular life just for a minute and –

He wants to play volleyball with Kageyama and hit his perfect tosses and fly in the air just like the rest of Karasuno and the Little Giant did, he just _wants_ –

“Hey, are you okay?”

Shouyou blinks. Kageyama is staring at him, face pink and shiny with shrimp chip dust. There’s a bit of purple jelly stuck in his teeth.

“Yeah,” Shouyou says, finally, just before the silence can stretch into something uncomfortable. “I just zoned out for a minute, sorry, Kageyama-kun. Do you,” he gestures vaguely behind him at the store. “Want some more snacks? There’s a brand of dried squid I wanted to try.” _Your diet_ , his manager yells in his head, and Shouyou makes a mental note to have a light breakfast tomorrow because vacation or not, she’s right, isn’t she.

“Oh. Sure?” Kageyama looks confused, but not entirely uncomfortable, so Shouyou grins and runs back inside.

The brand of dried squid that caught his eye earlier, at checkout, has a logo shaped like a purring cat. It reminds him of Kenma, and him gently urging Shouyou to play volleyball with Kageyama.

_It’s okay to want other things. It’s okay to try something else._

_It must be nice, being an idol._

“Kageyama-kun,” Shouyou asks when he’s back. “Can I ask you something? A request.”

“Sure, of course, Hinata-kun.”

“Will you play volleyball with me someday? Just for fun.”

**Author's Note:**

> ♡ leillypad: [twitter](https://twitter.com/fairytaemin)   
>  ♡ icedmango: [tumblr](https://belphine.tumblr.com/)


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